Closing Time, Reflecting Upon the Year

A kampong backroad with beautiful greens. How I will best remember Malaysia- many hues of green!

TB to Langkawi SMKS field trip

 

This was a difficult year. I have to acknowledge that. Sometimes I forget that things are hard because I am trying to make things a reality. I tried to excuse behaviors, cultural differences, difficult social situations, uncomfortable times, and bad days for “it’s all a part of the experience.” Sometimes I need to stop, sit, and say “yeah, today was tough and it is okay.” That being said, it has been the most incredible year of my life.

TB to meeting my students for their school trip at Pulau Perhenthian. One of my favorite places in the world- most beautiful place I have seen and made many sweet memories there!

This year has challenged me more than I could have ever anticipated. I learned more about myself than I thought I could. Being a theatre person, you are supposed to know yourself well from the little to the big things. I saw more this year (than I even wanted to) of myself and learned what that meant. I grew as a person. I grew as a cultural member. I grew in my language skills. I grew in my interpersonal and intrapersonal skills. I fit into a new cohort of diverse Americans. I found a place for myself in a place and community very different from me. I fell in love with my school community, fellow staff, and students. It will be hard to leave.

TB to a montage a student made for me from my first English Beach Clean Up camp!

As many songs fly through my head while I try to capture my sentiments at the end of the year, I mostly hear and keep revisiting “Closing Time” by Semisonic. The lyrics are the most appropriate for how I feel and how I am coping with leaving this beautiful state and country. Truly words cannot fully capture my experience and time here but it is the closest I feel I will get for now. I know I will come back to visit someday but not knowing when, makes it hard to tell these teary-eyed faces that I will see them again someday. The line “time to go out from the places you will be from” is how I justify my leaving. Yes, it it time for me to go home. I miss my family, friends, and community. I am ready to see them even if I am not quite ready to say goodbye here. I am tired of the bugs, heat, and lack of freedom in my community here even though my school is like a family to me where I can be myself 100% with silliness or seriousness and they accept me. I found a job I love where I do not quite have the full responsibilities of a teacher but I am teaching and having fun with students!

TB to my Female Empowerment Camp with the help of Miss Rachel. Some Form 4 and 5 girls sporting their confidence poster of future goals 🙂

“I know who I want to take me home” my parents and my puppies at home. I want to embrace them, even if for a moment. They are so important to me and this was the longest and farthest I have been away from them. There is still a lot of time in life and there will be a time I can travel and return to Narnia (aka Malaysia) some day but it is not next month or possibly even next year. It is time and I want to return home even if just for a short while.

TB to the Kelantan Vocational Arts Camp 2015 with my SMKS boys at the Royal family dinner!

TB to one of the interviews I did on the radio talking about the arts camp 🙂

“Turn all of the lights on every boy and every girl… last call” in a metaphorical way. I am spending my last moments celebrating with my students and loving on each and every one of them as much as I can. I have one last camp I got an US Embassy Grant for to celebrate them and build up their school English library. I am entering as many classes as possible. I am trying to visit with families or students I have grown close to as much as possible. And soaking up all of the love they are giving me in return. “Last call” for selfies, “sweet memories”, and so on here. This is not over or the final end but the end of a chapter for now. I am trying to not say “goodbye” but “see you later” in reality, that I truly believe I will be back someday. Possibly sooner than I realize…

TB to one of my favorite units with Form 1: Going Places. Today we did stations and traveled to California, USA

Form 1 sporting their “passports” after a long week “journey” to the USA!

“You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here” is where I am now. Okay yes, technically, I have to go back to the states as per my contract before whatever my next adventure and career move is, knowing it could be abroad again or close to home. I am at a pass where I want to be, what I want to be, or what I want to do next year but I know I cannot stay here in Malaysia. This year has been a great experience but I realized it needed to stay isolated as a year and I need to move onto something else, whatever that may be. Stopping at home will be nice to refresh, recharge my batteries, and then make a clear decision about my next moves.

Form 2 deciding how they would feel with certain diabilities

Form 2 final posters for our unit on people with disabilities. Trying to imagine and sympathize. Powerful and emotional day in class

“This room won’t be open til your brothers and sisters come.” This line could be literal that I need to bring my family here the next time I come or that I will revisit with a new grown relationship with these community members that I stay in touch with while I am gone until I return. There are many people I will stay in touch with here in Malaysia. I let students add my personal Facebook account as well as teachers. I also will try to maintain WeChat and possibly download WhatsApp again to keep in touch with students. I was a student teacher last year so technically they were my first students but this was my first group of full-year students (pretty much). On top of the crazy experience of a year they watched me grow through alongside of them this year.

Captured moment of me teaching the entire school the Cha Cha slide in groups to nominate students for my Talent Show “Selising Idol” camp 🙂

“So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits. I hope you have found a friend.” Time to pack up my things and fly to the exit. I did make some friends and I will remember this place but it is closing time for me, so I got to go. “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end” here in Malaysia. It is time for a new start in my life, something new, not knowing what yet. This ending starts a new beginning of something. I look forward to finding out what that is.

Some upper form boys teaching me the traditional performative art of Dikir Barat. A popular art form in the state of Kelantan where I have lived this year.

This has been a special year and trying to replicate it or add on did not seem right. It is now a foundational part of my philosophy as a teacher and citizen of the world. I will use this year to remember many things I am passionate about and want to fight for in society on small and large scales. Most of my ideologies were reaffirmed. Some grew, some changed. I am ready to jump into a new adventure while also learning this year what I need in my life to make me happy and comfortable. Closing time in Malaysia. On my Malay way… tomorrow, a new adventure begins.

Form 4 boys trying to be cool for a camera as we are in between takes of our film for the Sarawak Culture Exchange project we did with SMK Seburian

Bus moment from my last English camp buying books for the school library 🙂

TB to YES camp in Setiu, Terangganu making some friends my age 🙂

TB to teaching drama in my happy place, in my element at SMK Sri Nepah!

TB to first picture of my mentor and I when we first met!

TB to one of the first chorale speaking after school days this year 🙂

TB to a typical day in the office with some of my favorite people 🙂

Lyrics to Closing Time

Closing time

Open all the doors and let you out into the world

Closing time

Turn all of the lights on over every boy and every girl

Closing time

One last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer

Closing time

You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here

[Chorus:]

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

Take me home

Closing time

Time for you to go out to the places you will be from

Closing time

This room won’t be open till your brothers or your sisters come

So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits

I hope you have found a friend

Closing time

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end

[Chorus:]

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

Take me home

Closing time

Time for you to go out to the places you will be from

[Chorus:]

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

I know who I want to take me home

Take me home

Closing time

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end

Music Video of Closing Time

Kelantan Vocational Arts English Camp (KVAEC) 2015: The first of its kind and a new beginning

Yesterday we wrapped up a very successful and incredible two-day Arts English camp as part of a statewide cohort collaboration along with eight primary partners who helped make this possible: MAJLIS AGAMA ISLAM ADAT ISTIADAT NEGERI KELANTAN (MAIK), UNIVERSITI MALAYSIA KELANTAN (UMK), JABATAN PENDIDIKAN NEGERI KELANTAN (JPN), MALAYSIAN AMERICAN COMMISSION ON EDUCATIONAL EXCHANGE (MACEE), YAYASAN ISLAM KELANTAN (YIK), LIMKOKWING ACADEMY, TAYLOR’S UNIVERSITY, and MAJLIS KEBUDAYAAN NEGERI KELANTAN (Culture Centre). With more than 120 students from the state of Kelantan, 12 different art forms, several distinguished guest visitors including members of the Royal Kelantan Family, and 3 different news stations covering this event, it truly was an arts extravaganza extraordinaire!

The planning for this camp started months ago when we were approached by a leading foreign employee of MAIK for this idea. We had just finished our first big collaborative event with them and he wanted to start-up another one this time instead of American culture focus, make it Kelantan rooted-arts focused. It started as a small-scale idea to display artwork made by our students throughout the year featuring various Kelantanese arts from our state where we are placed. But through various connections made and much planning that arose in the months along the way, it turned into the mega arts camp that we carried out through this weekend. Our partners grew, our budget, grew, our VIP guests grew, yet the dedication remained constant throughout the planning process. Everyone involved was passionate and eager to see this event through the last bow and selfie taken on the UMK Bachok stage where we held this major camp event.

One feature that made this camp special was the fact that we had our “glue” Dr. Simon Cooke from MAIK making major connections for us as a collaborator along with many other talented as well as smart, hard-working people, and we wanted the focus to be in arts rather than English. Through our limited experiences as ETAs in Kelantan, we saw our top students month by month and event by event be praised for their academic results or competition awards they won. Yet the same students from each school tended to be praised for similar reasons, leaving a majority of the students lacking with positive reinforcement, praise for their efforts, special camp opportunities, or recognition otherwise. The lower performing students were often the focus to improve as per usual with an uniformed schooling systems, similar to struggles in American education. The top students were continually praised with treats, prizes, and special trips. Our middle-ground students were left behind, and checking out of school mentally and even physically. We could change the system but could we change the methods, we thought? Is there a way to praise the middle-performers who have an interest in art and often go unrecognized yet have so much potential to do so and improve? This camp was our first step towards seeing if we can change this mentality and system-building we saw in our schools specifically and in other instances we saw throughout the Malaysian education system.

We chose students who were not necessarily the highest performing students but showed us potential through various ways throughout the school year. We noticed specifically their interests related to vocational arts whether it be singing, drawing, or otherwise that we saw they took interest in or even had a talent for yet no space to show in school. Since this was a Kelantan arts focused camp, we also looked into partnering with our art teachers and other local experts who knew the arts well to seek out these students and appropriate art workshops for them that students could learn, participate in, and have something to perform for our showcase we planned to have on the second day of camp. This resulted in 12 different types of art we were able to provide for these students to try out in a 2 hr or so workshop, then rehearse and put final touches on for a comprehensive showcase on the second day of camp, closing out the programming for our mega arts camp event.

The arts featured included Modern and Traditional Wayang Kulit (a storytelling art form using puppets to re-tell local stories and tradition that is nearly outlawed in all of Malaysia but updated and re-purposed to remain alive in Kelantan), Wau (a traditional kite-making technique to produce beautiful intricately designed handmade kites for flying pleasure or competition), Gubahan (a traditional Malaysian style handicraft of floral arrangement used typically for wedding ceremonies), Dikir Barat (a traditional Kelantan art form using various instruments as the backdrop to the recitation and singing of chants in Bahasa Melayu and local dialect with groups accompanying in a seated position using synchronized hand motions and assisting in the chants), Silat (a traditional performative-style Malay martial art form), Mak Yong or Joget (traditional Kelate dances used for ceremonies and special events including holidays), Eco-fashion (a fashion technique using traditional Malay styles such as Baju Melayu and Baju Kurung with recyclable materials to design and display in a catwalk presentation), Batik Tye and Dye (a traditional method for designing and coloring clothing used throughout Malaysia and using local Kelantan resources for this specific style of Batik), Syair (traditional poetry recited in multiple styles solo or in groups for an audience at special ceremonies and occasions), Animation (using basic technology that the university leading this session used often to comment on Kelantan culture and helped tutor the students in learning basic maneuvers with the software for the workshop purposes) and Cooking (demonstrated on the second day by Taylor’s University using local Kelantan ingredients to maintain the same Kelantanese focus and local tie into their demonstration).

Over the two days, students arrived by bus organized by the JPN and began with breakfast provided by MAIK. Then participated in a dance workshop, lead by a visiting previous ETA, Jolene Hernandez who introduced them to the world of jazz and hip-hop getting them warmed up for the mega camp ahead. Next, the students heard from each of the participating artists who would provide the primary workshop demonstrations for students to learn and interact with throughout the camp and finish something to present at the final showcase. After recording their top five preferences, us ETAs collaborated over lunch to decide how to divide the students into two different sessions for them to get as much variety as possible. Then the students wandered away into the different art sessions, some even by themselves representing their school in hopes to make new friends, throughout the large UMK Bachok campus with UMK and Limkokwing Academy students assisting in giving directions and making the art alongside our secondary students (great mentoring opportunity)! Once the two sessions finished we gathered for a celebrity gala planned by Prof. Rosdi from UMK who invited TT and Her Majesty (Third ruling Royal family member from the top in Kelantan and his wife the first daughter of the first Prime Minister of Malaysia), their daughter, the Vice Chancelor of UMK, and other distinguished guests from our various partnering organizations. The Royal family walked through the entire audience of students, teachers, and helpers alike greeting every individual during a multi-art performance over a catered dinner both planned by UMK artists and staff. Then a surprise Malaysian karaoke including a classic song sung by TT himself, breaking typical Malay Royal protocol to entertain the crowd and share his love of song, among me singing “Let it Go” from Frozen (my go-to performance song for this year), and ending the night with a final group number and official end offs before calling it a night.

The next day, students gathered for breakfast then a special talk and presentation from Nik Farhan also from UMK who introduced a video specially produced for this cohort of campers by none other than the famous New York bound Fashion designer who claims roots from Kuala Krai, Kelantan- Zang Toi himself. A professionally produced and quality short video narrating his childhood and growth into the famous, successful fashion designer he has become today. The students were impressed and enthralled with his words (all in English mind you) as well as seeing how he came from a background similar to theirs yet has become such a success today! Following that, Limkokwing Academy and Taylor’s University gave short talks about arts vocations in the professional world, university life, and options for these students interested in similar vocations.

Following that Taylor’s University who flew in all the way from Kuala Lampur, the other side of Malaysia brought their master chef, Khairul Anuar Muhamad to run a cooking demonstration for all 120 students making dry-ice ice cream with local Kelantan herbs and flavors for the students to see and try themselves. Along with the Chef, a staff member Nuqman Jauhari coordinated bringing two students that attended the University now as chefs-in-training who came from Kelantan (first Kelantan students in the culinary program in the history of Taylor’s University) that are MAIK scholarship students there funded by our main partner and a true testament of the possibilities for our students’ futures to come, to help with the ice cream-making. These two female university students now at Taylor’s were dropped off about six months ago, with very little vocabulary to converse in English and here they are finished with their third semester, officially in the culinary restaurants helping with the gourmet menus and using very “brilliant” English as Dr. Simon Cooke exclaimed. Finally, students put final touches on their visual and performative pieces then the showcase began.

I was the MC for the closing showcase, but still able to appreciate all of the magic that unfolded on that UMK Bachok campus stage. Students were a bit nervous and apprehensive as we could see yet, they still came to life, being applauded, and recognized in a new way, maybe even for the first time ever. Almost every student was significantly featured including a very shy student of mine who barely speaks or participates in school yet designed most of the puppets for the Modern Wayang Kulit workshop and narrated the story written by him and his friends from our school SMK Selising, Pasir Puteh, Kelantan for the performance. When I saw MJ from Limkokwing Academy who lead the session, hand him the microphone I nearly jumped on the stage to congratulate my student. Although instead, I excitedly poked my head out from the MC stand and whispered to my English cohort of teachers attending the showcase, “Syukur has the microphone! This is him talking!” They were thrilled beyond words to hear this news and were beaming as they recorded the whole performance. I was so proud and ecstatic to see the work that the students produced and the level to which they performed for this event. As our Kelantan JPN coordintor Che Najib said himself “There has never been an event like this… in all of Malaysia… I am very proud of the work you have accomplished… a job well done!” Many parties were very impressed with the turnout for this event. All of us collaborators and planners were both proud and beyond satisfied as well with how the weekend turned out. We hope this is a new model for a new way of teaching and opportunities that can be provided for the future generations of students in these districts, in all of Kelantan, all of Malaysia, and even worldwide. It is a weekend that will remain ingrained in our hearts and memories forever. We forged new relationships. We took roads never taken before and risks unthinkable as it seemed at the beginning of this planning process. We stuck to our mission and objectives then watched them be achieved before our eyes during the final showcase.

Coming to Malaysia, I had high hopes and big dreams to make a difference and leave a legacy here. I wanted to conduct some sort of arts and cultural exchange through the programming I was instructed to carry out. I hoped to foster relationships with students as well as my fellow cohort members, meet new faces, and learn new local traditional art forms to understand the true Malay way. I wanted to grow and change and see the fruits of something I worked on. This weekend was the epitome of that thought coming true in a reality I could see. I do not know what the students ultimately took away from this program. I do not know what they will do with the experiences they had, the art forms they were exposed to, the things they learned, or the “sweet memories” we shared. However, I do know I was proud of our event. I saw the students light up in various ways at various times throughout the camp. And whether we fully see it ourselves of not, I believe we did make a difference this weekend. I could not have envisioned, imagined, or dreamed of something like this happening this year, yet here we are. I am so blessed and forever indebted to all of those who helped make this camp become a reality and success! I hope to see and hear more things like this happening in the future of Malaysia and education beyond these borders.

Changing lives and creating artistic cultural exchange today, mystery lies ahead for tomorrow. Learning the Malay way.

          

Singapore Luxury: Trying out Singapore Despite our Wallets

One of my friends and I decided to go on a slightly last-minute getaway to the luxuriously clean and beautiful Singapore for a weekend. It coincided with their month of Independence and a school holiday we had for Malaysia’s National Day of Independence: Hari Merdeka which we would hope to fly back for and enjoy on our way home in Malaysia. We had little time and money to plan but it was just the relaxation and taste of big city we had missed for so long and needed to get a break from our busy planning we currently had going on in Kelantan Malaysia. It was the week before a mega statewide arts camp so we wanted to give ourselves a break and a treat for all of our hard work. We got to see some major sights, fit in shopping at some glamorous malls, see old and new friends, as well as play with puppies which we also has missed. It was hard not to fall in love with the safe and pristine state of Singapore as we ventured through the city without much worry about anything.

MORE COMING SOON…!

Harry Potter English Camp at SMK Pelagat: Here We Go Again

We prepare ourselves for this day long or three day long phenomenon as part of our ETA experience called an “English camp”. If we are planning it, by the end we are pulling our hair out making sure all goes right. If we are a guest ETA, as I was for this one, we usually show up in our Fulbright t-shirt we were given during orientation for free. I on the other hand took on a new and different role for this one. Our two friends teaching as ETAS in Besut, Terangganu, Malaysia were planning a Harry Potter-themed English camp. I was supposed to take a personality test and be placed in one of their camp-created “houses” but I forgot. Also, I am a unique individual so they gave me my own character to create for the day. A peavishly-annoying character who would cause chaos and reward English-usage but scold the use of their native tongue in BM with house minus points in the form of a frizzled professor by the name of Professor Magical Crazy pants; a character they would never forget.

MORE COMING SOON..!

Feels Like Home: Balik Kampung Selemat Hari Raya

Balik kampung….balik kampung… Plays in several songs on the radio as the end of Ramdhan comes to a close and the annually anticipated Hari Raya (meaning Great Day, the Malaysian holiday equivalent to the Muslim Eid in other Muslim-practicing countries and cultures) approaches… This was my experience celebrating Hari Raya here in Malaysia for the first time.

I had waited all year, leading up to this big day, for this holiday to finally roll around. It was more spectacular than I even imagined. Travelling around during the full holiday experience, going house to house, meeting all of the extended family, trying all of the traditional and popular or “glamour” foods for Hari Raya all made it so special. I was starting to really miss home and my family so this was a nice taste of family life and seeing how Malaysian families interact. One of my favorite moments, was when we all dressed in our Baju Raya (matching color clothes as you can see in the pictures) for a photo shoot and celebrated the youngest sibling’s birthday. He was born on the eve of Hari Raya Aidilfitri (full name of this holiday since there are two Hari Rayas in Malaysia- fun fact I found out, the second is in September) so his middle name is named after the holiday. The night before we also lit up some fireworks we had purchased at the Ramadhan bazaar the night before to kick off his celebrations. It was so nice to see how the family celebrated him, laughed with him, siblings made jokes to tease him, and I myself started reminiscing in the silly moments I was missing with my siblings. I sat slightly off from a distance and could not help but smile. I just wanted to watch them laugh and interact with each other all day. Of course, then I was served ice cream cake from Baskin Robins and got distracted by the sweet chilly tastes in my mouth. But it was a favorite moment of the experience.

I was approached a couple weeks before Hari Raya by an English teacher I share an office with, who asked me to come with her back to her kampung (village). I had met a couple of her siblings before in Putrajaya (same awesome family who toured me around there) and she thought it would be nice for me to meet the whole family, especially since I would be alone without family for this momentous holiday in Malaysia. Besides.. the city in my state called Kota Bharu would be impossible to get around since nearly all of Kelantan is roaming around house to house- with over 90% of a Muslim Malay population in my state celebrating the upcoming holiday. I was so honored and flattered by the invitation, I did not think twice before agreeing to come along with her. I did not know how to fully prepare myself for this trip but was so excited to be tagging along!

Leaving for Melaka was an experience in itself as we drove over night from Kelantan (luckily against the traffic). So many people who grew up in my state where I am placed in Kelantan often grow up to work in the West coast in peninsular Malaysia (on the opposite coast) yet they always “balik kampung” (go back to their home town) for the holidays so there is a huge jam (traffic). We stopped around 2:00am or so at my teacher’s husband’s sister’s house in Negeri Sembilan (another state where I had not visited yet) to give gifts and wish her well on her upcoming trip to America. Another “Sweet memory” as is common to say in Malaysia here. We got to discuss all of my favorite things in Washington, D.C. and New York City where she would be travelling. Then made it around 4:00 am to her family’s house to sleep for almost an hour and wake up to break the fast. Luckily with Ramadhan still finishing once we got up to eat before the sun came up and we had to stop around 5:30 am before we fasted until about 7:30 depending on the movement of the sun for that day, the family would go for prayer and I could fall back asleep as well as take frequent naps during the day when we were not cooking or going around town. Most of the sight-seeing happened after Ramadhan ended though, since we only had a couple days left and wanted to save our energy for the fasting.

From helping prepare the chickens for slaughter, cooking ketupat (a traditional style of rice in coconut leaves wrapped a special way, steamed for hours, and eaten with various savory meat dishes), sharing a room with her younger sister, sharing moments and memories with all six of the siblings, meeting the extended family at buffets for breaking the fast or celebrating Hari Raya, serving the extended family when we hosted, roaming around Melaka at night taking selfies, and MORE- it was one of the “sweetest” (literally and figuratively) parts of my year here. Just what I needed to break up a difficult month of fasting and hitting the half way point in my grant. I really wanted to feel as much as part of the family for that week as they would allow me- give me chores and work to do I pleaded! They did! It was great. I was so happy to have a family to be a part of when I was missing mine so much, even if just for a week. It brought my English teacher and I closer as well which was another bonus on top of all of the wonderful things that resulted from this week in Melaka with this family. I took a night bus home and got sick on the way back, nearly got stranded at 3am 4-5 hours from my Asrama (hostel) where I live in my state of Kelantan on the way home… but all apart of the adventure and worth the extended 12 hours overnight bus home!

I was stuffed SO full with each house visit and so tired after the trip but I would do it all over again. I loved everything about Hari Raya. I saw how special the holiday is, seeing the tight-knit community of family, Muslim culture, more exchange of ideas, religion, and culture as well as so many family photo ops. Another great week in Malaysia! I am so blessed to be in the placement I have, meet this generous teacher and her family, as well as have all of these amazing life experiences that help me grow in my faith, experiences, ideologies, and passions in this world. These are the moments that help me shape my adult life into the further adventures that lay ahead. Melaka for Hari Raya this day. Who can guess for tomorrow?!

 

Malaysia boleh on my Malay way. What a year so far!

Navigating through Ramadhan: Fasting and Culture 101

    RAMADHAN

So, with permission from my community, I decided to take it upon myself to attempt fasting for the entirety of the month of Ramadhan. My entire school community would be partaking as part of the Malay Muslim tradition here in Malaysia. Christians have their own times of fasting which I have always been curious about, and I thought this would be a good self-reflective as well as educational experience for me. It was a long month, arguably the longest-seeming month of the year but I made it!

Starting from the very first day I was very conscious of my choice not to eat. It is one thing to get caught up in things throughout the day, remain busy and forget to eat. However, making the choice not to eat, in this instance, from my experience was a lot harder to not focus on or pass the time without craving food. Food was on my mind all day especially at first. I had to wake up much earlier, I was trying to keep energy up while I was teaching, I was not sure I would make it through the whole month, even struggling through the first week. In the end, with a few flexible days to break the fast while I traveled or waking up slightly late and eating a bit later for a couple of days, I was able to partake the full month. With the late days, I gave myself a bit of a break since this was my first try.

I also still drank some water to keep myself from getting dehydrated in the heat which I share with me school. This was a point of contention however with my school community because to them, this is not a true fast. However, I tried to remind them, this was my way and my first time. Additionally I had no religious or cultural requirement to withhold from drinking some water. I was also worried about my health. And finally, there is a spectrum of fasting as I tried to explain with other religious communities of people. In some countries and communities of religions, fasting is just with holding from a certain food or pleasure for the time of fasting such as is typical for those who practice Catholicism during Lent. Others just do a solids fast such as Christians sometimes or other communities of Muslims. Then like Malaysian Muslims typically practice, there are people who withhold from eating or drinking from sunrise to sunset. Then there are even spectrums of requirements or decisions for fasting based on the time of the sunrise or the religious practice, etc. Then there are certain Muslim cultures and communities in other countries which do not even keep in the saliva in their mouths. Although, being in such a close-knit society without much travel outside of our kampung (village) or Malaysia, my fasting was very different from what they knew so it was difficult to navigate through conversations with some, but it created a great opportunity for cultural exchange.

I promised to commit to trying to participate in the whole month and journal all the while. This was a great exercise since I was not writing in my journal much this year before Ramadhan, which I regret. Since Ramadhan I have tried to journal once or twice a week to record my more intimate reflections and moments here aside from my blog narrative. It has been fun reading through this month after-the-fact and seeing how my reflection changed, noting which days were clearly harder than others, and what days were really positive in terms of self and religious reflection as I had hoped. The first two days I had energy and thoughts to fill two pages but most days after that were limited to just one. “And so I pray to be reminded of the reasons that I am choosing to do this, be true to myself, not to confuse those around me, also find a balance of remaining productive, find ways to relate to my school community, and have a lot of reflection time with God. And so the journey begins as it also continues…” Were my final words in my first entry. Compared to Day 5 “Couldn’t sleep for over two hours due to itchiness. I believe from bugs and being hot… We’ll see how my energy lasts tomorrow.” Clearly frustrated but trying to be hopeful for the next day. Honestly, journaling kept my mind balanced and focused on trying to think of the positive while processing this journey through Ramadhan and winding down at the end of the day.

My month became more and more tolerable as well as rewarding as I got used to the schedule and cadence of fasting. In the midst of all of this there was mid-year, breaking the fast with students, celebrating July 4th in Malaysia away from home for the first time (one of the big holidays for my family), typical monthly school activities minus my after-school activities plus lethargic students who were not motivated even for my most exciting lessons (most days), saw time flying by and two brothers finishing important years of school as I missed these important moments back home among others and remained abroad, listening to my sister and dogs grow up back home, get a new teaching timetable to adjust to (schedule), experience Hari Raya, and many other events in between. It was a whirlwind of a month that felt long during the hours passing by between sunrise and sunset as I waited for the time to break the fast yet included some of the most rich cultural experiences I’ve participated in during this year teaching abroad in Malaysia. I was invited to several student and teacher’s houses, including an English teacher whom I have grown close with over the year that you can read about in my Hari Raya blog post, and got to experience nearly the full Malaysian experience during this significant religious and culture time here in a Muslim Malay community. In my last journal entry I was more than thrilled to have pushed through and it made Hari Raya that much more special to experience as a reward! “Selemat Hari Raya! Yay, I did it! Finished, now to a day I have been excited about since hearing about it in January!…Then the grand tour began as we went to five…houses… I even tried to pace myself at most houses not knowing what foods were left in store at the next house…great to see all of the families…” I really enjoyed getting the homegrown experience with my teacher. I hope to reflect upon this time which was a different type of challenge than I have tried. Whether emotional or academically or otherwise before, this new physical challenge was a great feat! I was proud and blessed to have been awarded the strength to make it through. First time, a success! There were many tough days but the reward was greater than the defeat!

Fasting during Ramadhan… tomorrow lies ahead another mystery in Malaysia. On my Malay way…

Sharing My World in Malaysia: “These are a few of my favorite things!”

After being in Malaysia for about five months, some of the luster is lost. That is, until someone visits you for you to share the experience with and be reminded of the large and small reasons why this world is so special. You not only share your favorite places and times but also exchange the cultural experience with someone foreign to being here to remember the little things.

We started in KL which sometimes I forget how lucky I am to be close enough to such a diverse metropolitan developing city. It has an array of glamorous shopping malls, tall buildings, cultural village areas (Little India, Chinatown, etc) with great food options, beautiful, rich, short days in trips close enough to travel to by taxi or bus, and accessible to fly to many surrounding countries and international abroad elsewhere. We ate in Chinatown and attempted to see the famous light show at the Petronas Towers downtown but missed the window of taking the metro and our 6am flight was approaching sooner than we expected. So we crashed and left for Cambodia the next morning. A separate blog post discusses that trip.

Once we returned from Cambodia, we explored my town and village area. I took her through the Kota Bharu capital city of my state, ate at a local favorite, then came back to my asrama (hostel) to recover and crash for the night before our trip the next day. It had already been a long trip and adventure but we were going to my favorite local islands the next morning. My friend Tina was a trooper to fight through jet lag and everything else to continue enjoying our trip together.

We got up a bit late to catch the afternoon ferry which leaves from the Besut, Terengganu jeti in the neighboring state south of Kelantan where I live. Once we arrived we had to take another small boat to the bigger island. This was my first time doing this since the other times I had visited Pulau Perhenthian islands before I stayed on the smaller island (kecil). We got to Pulau Besar (Big Island) to check into our hotel and still sneak in our free breakfast. My friend got to appreciate the crystal clear, bright hues of blue in the water along with the white sandy beaches. She agreed it was some of the most beautiful waters and beaches she had seen. Hence why it became my getaway and nearly a second home for me this year.

Once we settled, unpacked, and were ready for our next leg of the adventure, we came up with a game plan for the day. The plan was for us to meet up with some of my students who were camping on the other side of the island and potentially barbeque with them. However, the only way back was by a water taxi which could be slightly Mahal-lah (expensive) at night, jungle trek back in the dark (which was unsafe and not really a possibility), or crash with them in a tent and not stay the night in the hostel we paid for already. I pitched the idea to my friend with our options. I was leaning towards staying in the tent with them that night but would be game for whatever she wanted to do. She agreed spending more time with my students and staying the night on their side of the island was best- this is why we are best friends and she is awesome!!

We trek over for about an hour to the other side, walk along the beach, and stumble upon some of my students returning from a snorkeling trip which they were excited to brag about. They were so happy to see me since it had been a long time since I last saw them and they were even more excited to meet my BFF from America. Of course, she soaked up all their excitement and love. We basked in the laughter, jokes, barbeque, pictures, and otherwise that night and the next day. Even months later, several students bring up how special it was to meet her, how they miss her, and what a “sweet” memory that was. Those of them that were on that camping trip.

Once we said goodbyes, took for photos with students and teachers, we trekked back to our side of the island for another breakfast and to venture to the smaller island (my favorite place). In some ways, sharing these things was difficult since it was so special and dear to me. However, there could not be much more of a better person (besides maybe my family) to share this world with than my best friend of over a decade! She was a great sport to learn a lot from me about Kelantan, Malaysia, and my surroundings otherwise. She was up for the adventures I took us on, and she reminded me of just how special living this year in Malaysia has been. When times were low or feeling slow, when I was missing home, this trip helped me re-gain momentum and refresh my motivation for continuing to work hard and soak up all of moments and every day of this experience.

The day on the small island was so fun. We got to be our goofy selves and enjoy the beautiful happenings of the island. We took kayaks out our last morning to enjoy our last view of the island, including probably my last for the year. We took the jetty back, grabbed my car, relaxed for the night, and planned our next day. Once again, my friend being awesome, despite her tiredness and jet lag still lingering, we went hiking at my favorite spot 2 hours away the next morning, spending most of the day there. We packed a picnic to enjoy at the top of the waterfall (not that we hiked all the way up but this place claims to be the highest waterfall in SE Asia). We climbed my normal trek to the second tier, ate our lunch, and trekked back down to then make our way back. We did not stop there. I promised to give her the full experience as much as possible. So of course, I had to put her in traditional dress… We put on some of my Baju Kurung and went out to a local restaurant to enjoy some local cuisine.

Our flights to KL the next day were luckily in the afternoon so we could finish laundry, we spent our last day cleaning my house (thank you Tina that was a great present for me and help!) Then we ate one more meal at a local kedai (small restaurant shop) for some real local Kelantanese favorites of mine. Char Kuey Teow (fried thai-style noodles with some of meat, few vegetables in a savory brown sauce) with some fruit juice kosong (without milk or sugar which is the norm to put in fruit juices, at least in my state of Kelantan, Malaysia). We managed to fit a lot in and it was so fun to share many of my favorite things about my world here in Malaysia. It was nice to see a best friend and familiar face from home. I was refreshed to go into the second half of the year, reminded of my blessings, and ready for more “sweet memories” here in Malaysia before returning home.

Sharing today, making new memories tomorrow. Malaysia 2015. On my Malay way…       

Mid-Year in Melaka: Reuniting all once again

This past week, all of the Malaysia Fulbright ETAs in our cohort gathered to reunite in Melaka, Malaysia. This is the first time we all came back together as one group since we left orientation. This was both a great and overwhelming opportunity for us since we could all catch up, collaborate, problem-solve, support one another, and continue where we left off. Not only that but now we were in a new place, exploring this new place (for most of us) while all deepening or creating new friendships. We had less than four days along with full days of meeting to accomplish all of this. Some of the ETAs living nearby or that I spent time with leading up to the mid-year set of meetings, discussed how we had mixed feelings anticipating this reunion. However, in the end, our expectations were exceeded, and from who I talked to, all seemed to have positive responses to mid-year.

           

We flew in Wednesday June 24th in the midst of Ramadhan mind you, but that stopped no one from anything (except from enjoying ALL of the free hotel food for those of us fasting). We were all very excited to greet each other with hugs and laughter. The big moment came where we all at once, over 100 people, tried to greet everyone right after getting off our flights or in from our various journeys, which was over-stimulating. I decided to quickly check in and have down time to take a quick breather before our first meeting. Once things began, the momentum kept flowing. People had positive, energetic vibes. The topics discussed in the various meetings, workshops, and presentations carried mixed subjects, sets of emotions, reactions, and items for our “Fulbright toolbox”. In previous meetings there were certain times that did not seem as applicable or on the opposite side of the spectrum felt more intense and stressful yet in this week’s case, most everything seemed useful and helpful to discuss.

Now that we are half way through our year, we can bring in more context to both discuss and process this compiled incoming information. This I believe, helped us find both our differences and commonalities to help make sessions appropriate for as many of us as possible. Coming back from this week, we can hope to feel refreshed and ready to get things going for the second half of the year. Both providing a nice change of pace from our regular work week and a way to remind ourselves of our support system. From a pure social perspective we could talk with people we did not get to talk with as much or even at all during our original orientation in KL which was nice to meet more of our talented, smart, amazing cohort. This became more motivation and inspiration, at least for me, reminding me of the privilege of being here in a different way, yet again.

Seeing the city was nice to see a different area of Malaysia, a part of the country where no one in our cohort is placed. Very few had visited this place previously and it gave us another historical context to this diverse, complex, unique country known as Malaysia. There were historical brick walls, preserved colonial ships, as well as old relics in museums, alongside upscale shopping malls, designer stores, hotels, diverse restaurants, and more with the Melaka River running through it. At the end of our meetings we managed to tour a bit of the city, celebrate five birthdays among the cohort or so, listen to Christmas music in a hotel cafe we rented out for an evening, witness several “hidden talents” as some of these pictures suggest in a cohort talent show, and make more “sweet memories” as commonly said in Malaysia, with one another. Another adventure checked off the list for this year. Melaka today, back to Kelantan kampung (village) life tomorrow. Malaysia boleh!

The Cambodian Experience: Cultural Understanding “What is Khmer?”

As a special visitor from the US comes to meet me for my holiday vacation, I start to minimally look up “What is Cambodia?” I had friends recently travel there giving me tips and stories of their experiences trying to understand it as well as me coming in with my preconceived ideas from other people telling me their opinions or stories but I wanted to get a better since before deciding to travel there myself. Of course I was planning this trip and research geared more towards “Tourist attractions” but I wanted to fit in homegrown experiences and opportunities to connect with the people and culture if possible within a week’s time. The research was not even a hinted taste compared to the experience my best friend and I had while visiting.

MORE COMING SOON!

Langkawi Island on the West Coast with my SMKS students

                       

I took off for the Western Malaysian island for the week on Tuesday April 7th at 9:30 pm with students and teachers from my school SMK Selising on a bus not sure what to expect. An overnight bus when I am sleep-deprived with excited students from my school. Not sure what I was getting myself into but was excited for the opportunity to go. I have heard the most wonderful things about this island, claiming to be better than Perhenthian Islands even, with more of a tourist attraction. A lot of anticipation on my part after hearing that there are beaches and lots of chocolate- you have me sold. I have no idea what is even on the agenda except for something “educational” and shopping! Okay-lah, jom!

We piled onto a bus after 9pm leaving for the West coast. Students were dropped off in various means. One of my housemates drove me to school and wished me luck for the unknown week that was about to unfold before me in the form of a Malaysian school field trip. The week was full of surprises and other semi-expected events. There was in fact a lot of shopping as was I forewarned would happen by fellow teachers and other Malaysians in my community. We went to over 8 different shopping venues and one time left the students in the hotel while us teachers shopped for dishware for over four hours. A very different-style vacation from my tastes but Malaysia boleh (can) as we say in Malaysia. Interspersed with shopping were also fun excursions including riding the steepest cable car in the world (as it claimed), taking many selfies of course (both with students and teachers), taking a boat tour of a geo-forest park to see wildlife (eagles feeding on fish naturally and some unnatural animal farms including sting rays, crocodiles, and various fish), Langkawi museum, and visiting Eagle Point where there is a famous giant eagle statue. It was a very pleasant trip although difficult to figure out my role, place, and how to behave as my lifestyle and culture is very different from my school community’s.

I found a way to blend in yet still stood out as the foreigner the entire trip. I was an advocate for my students and fought to focus the trip on things they might want to do since this was a unique opportunity for them to travel which many of them do not have the usual chance to do. A night where there was nothing planned after 7pm my students were complaining that they came all this way and are staying in a hotel for most of the trip so, I asked if I and another teacher could take them to the night market. We set parameters and rules which the students completely followed and were grateful for the adventure. Overall a huge success on the trip. It was also a way to show my students my care for them as this was still fairly early on in the year and one of the first intimate experiences outside of the classroom they had experienced with/ of me. I also was not wearing the typical baju kurung as they usually saw me in everyday (although still had to be Kelantan-level conservative appropriately dressed but good change of pace for them I think.)

 

It was a great way to see more of the cadence of a Muslim Malaysian lifestyle. The impact of call to prayer and stopping five times a day at a surau (place for prayer) even when taking an overnight bus. In addition to doing active things more so than I expected. Witnessing the expectations of students having to be up early for prayer and such but also wearing school uniform, which is a part of public education in Malaysia, when they are travelling place-to-place. Overall, it was a great experience which brought me closer to my school and community.